Sometimes, I wonder
Am I in a world
Where nothing else matters
Except for today?
Sometimes, I wonder
Are people real
Or are we just flesh
That will disentigrate?
Sometimes, I wonder
Is there eternal life
And will I see my Mom
In heaven one day?
Sometimes, I wonder
About these vacation glasses
You know, do they
Make my eyes look big?
I don’t know, sometimes
I just wonder.
It has been proven that highly creative people’s brains work quite differently than other brains. That special brain wiring that can create such wonderful art, music, and writing can often lead to strain in a relationship, because of those differences. If you’ve ever loved a highly creative person, you know that it can seem like they live in their own little world at times, and that thought isn’t far from the truth. Here are some things to keep in mind when you are in love with a highly creative person:
The highly creative mind is one that is running at full speed all the time. Although it can be a source of crazy, spontaneous fun – it can also be a burden. Highly creative people rarely keep normal sleep cycles, and are often prone to bouncing from one task to another throughout the day. It can be exhausting to try to keep up.
2. They are Cyclical
The flow of creativity is a cycle, full of highs and lows. Some people may consider this “manic” behavior, but in reality, it is just how the creative process works. Keep this in mind as your partner goes through these natural ebbs and flows. The low periods aren’t permanent.
3. They Need Time Alone
Creative minds need air to breathe. Whether it is their own little work space or an escape to somewhere quiet, they need a time and place to be alone with their thoughts. Some people are inclined to think that if nothing is being said that there is something wrong, but with creative people that is not the case. They are just working within their own head.
4. They are Intensely Focused
When a creative person is on task, they are fiercely intense. The change from being scatter-brained to hyper-focused can be difficult to deal with, so just understand that it is how their brains work. Don’t get frustrated.
5. Emotions Run Deeper
Creative people feel everything on a deeper level. What doesn’t seem like a big deal to you, can be crushing to them. It’s that same passion that goes into whatever they create that drives them to love you, so understand that with the good – comes the bad.
6. They Speak in Stories
Creative people often express themselves in experiences, instead of just saying what they want to say. It is a way of sharing themselves that personifies who they are. At times, it can be difficult to figure out what a creative person is saying, so don’t be afraid to read between the lines.
7. They Battle with Themselves
Being creative can be a serious internal struggle. Motivation, enthusiasm, direction, and drive can all be issues for creative people. Some days it is hard for them just to get out of bed, and other days you can’t get them to slow down. Be patient in the lulls, because there is usually a burst of activity right around the corner.
8. Intuition is Important
Creative people, because of their intense emotional tendencies, tend to rely on intuition over logic. They go with their gut. Some people consider this to be more on the “impulsive” end of the spectrum. The creative mind doesn’t rely on logic to make a decision, it relies on experience and passion.
9. They Struggle with Confidence
When people create, especially for a living, they are always struggling with acceptance. That is art. They have to wear their hearts on their sleeves, and so they always question whether or not what they are producing is good enough. Being supportive is the key to loving a creative person.
10. Growing Up is Hard to Do
Creative people are almost always children at heart. That care-free nature can seem immature and impetuous – but it is all part of the deal. Understand that the aspects of their creative brains that you love are the same ones that make them somewhat irresponsible when it comes to being an adult.
A friend of mine gave this to me and after reading it I forwarded the message to others (something I usually do not do). If you are in a work environment that can be hostile at times, there is some great advice here. It is actually great advice for any situation or aspect of life.
THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF HANDLING CONFLICT
BY JOHN C. MAXWELL. JULY 17, 2013
“I love mankind – it’s people I can’t stand.” Charlie Brown, in Charles Schulz’ timeless comic strip, “Peanuts” Charlie Brown had a point: relationships with other human beings are wonderful – in theory. In reality, they can be difficult and messy. But nothing determines our success in life as much as our ability to work with other people. And nothing is more messy in relationships than dealing with conflict. But I believe there are both constructive and destructive ways to approach it.
Here are my top ten responses:
1. Obey the 101% Principle. What’s that? “Find the 1% that you agree on and give it 100% of your effort.” Writer Cullen Hightower said, “There’s too much said for the sake of argument and too little said for the sake of agreement.” The first and best response when conflict emerges in a relationship is to actively search for the areas where you already agree. It’s the quickest way to start moving the conflict toward resolution.
2. Love people more than opinions. Do you know anyone who does the opposite? How much conflict does he or she experience in life? It’s my belief that anyone who loves his opinions more than his friends will defend his opinions and destroy his friends. Focus on the relationship over and above the issue, and you’ll keep the lines of communication open.
3. Give others the benefit of the doubt. I’ve often said that to handle yourself, you should use your head. But to handle others, you should use your heart. It’s natural to do the opposite: To let ourselves off the hook while we demand perfection from others. Assume right motives from the person you’re in conflict with. This defuses defensiveness and allows you both to focus on solving the problem at hand.
4. Learn to be flexible. Thomas Jefferson famously said, “In matters of principle, stand like a rock. In matters of taste, swim with the current.” Ask yourself two important questions: “Does this really make a difference?” and “Will I care about this tomorrow?” If you answer “no,” then perhaps you can compromise on your position.
5. Provide an escape hatch for the other person in the conflict. Years ago, in their policy for dealing with angry customers, Enterprise Car Rentals urged staff to “never let the customer lose face.” It’s tempting in a conflict to try to argue the other person into a corner, to try to force them to agree with you. But it’s more realistic and effective to gently persuade them, so they can compromise without feeling like they’ve lost.
6. Check your own attitudes. It’s been said that if Joe has a problem with Paul, and Joe has a problem with Karen, and Joe has a problem with Samuel, then maybe Joe is the problem. Is conflict a frequent part of many of your relationships? Perhaps it’s time to take a look in the mirror and see if your actions or attitudes are the cause of the recurring conflict.
7. Don’t overreact. When conflict arises, it’s important to keep it in perspective and react appropriately. How big of an issue is it, really? Does your reaction match it in intensity? If not, then you might be responding to an underlying issue or something from your past. I believe that when my response is more intense than the issue at hand, then my response is often about something else. That’s something I need to resolve with myself.
8. Don’t become defensive. Contrary to how it makes us feel, most conflict is not directly about us. Instead, it’s a problem to be solved by two or more people. Avoid the blame game, and you’ll have a clearer head for approaching the problem logically.
9. Welcome the conflict. In spite of our best efforts, we will all have conflict with other people, because they’re not just like us. They have different personalities, beliefs, and desires, so there will be disagreements and misunderstandings. Rather than running from conflict, or reacting with horror when it comes up, focus on resolving it together and making it a learning experience. It’s been said that conflict can give you either ulcers or understanding.
10. Take a risk. This is the hardest part. When faced with the potential for conflict, we may be tempted to disconnect and distrust. We think that will avoid pain. But the reality is that everyone in relationship gets hurt. I made the decision a long time ago that I would rather risk being hurt than keep people at a distance. So I choose every day to be vulnerable with others, to believe the best about them, and trust them.
Conflict is an inevitable part of life. And these ten commandments aren’t all that can be said about handling it. But following them will help you approach conflict in a healthy and constructive way, setting the stage to work together to find a resolution that allows both of you to win.
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.